On watching Project Runway obsessively, S11E9

Is it just me or has this season been going on for a million years already? And this week there were still seven designers left in the running. Jesus. We'll never be done at this rate. Normally I wouldn't really mind, Project Runway has a tendency of being entertaining even when things turn out horribly, but this week's episode was just drama times a million, bad fashion, bad choices and just left both Y and I feeling totally exasperated. Nothing fun, nothing good, not much creativity - and the whole teams thing is imploding. No-one acts like they're on a team at all. Everyone does their own thing and hopes that their team member will scrape by, but that leads to bad designers staying in the game much much longer than is necessary. They've also started voting off every single contestant I have any kind of interest in, so pretty soon it'll be a final runway showdown between bland and blander. Oh Project Runway, how you've fallen.

Best tonight, not that that s a big whoop.

So congrats to Michelle, who despite being the most whiny person I've had to listen to for ages, made something that was presentable. Boring, simple and with a colour difficult for most people to see themselves in, but all in all probably a good look for manufacturing for Lord & Taylor. It's a sad day in Project Runway history when this was the most interesting thing on the runway. Also, thank god Tim stopped her from the totally insane idea of a rain vest. What would be the point? When would you ever be OK with your arms getting wet when everything else would be dry?

Stanley, master of the odd hem lengths.

Another well-executed snooze-fest. I don't understand Stanley's deal with making skirts and dresses that feel both too long and too short at once. He seems to love the weird in-between length that I just think looks horribly off. Also, while he was going for a relaxed fit, the dress looked much to big on the runway. I really didn't get it.

Coral madness.

People were practically wetting themselves online over Patricia finally producing something that wasn't absolutely cray-cray. I don't get it. It looks far better on picture that it did to me on the runway though, I'll give her credit for that. There's just something about flow-y tops that I think makes everyone look like they're hiding a bit of a belly under all those layers. Also the weird coral/salmon coloured capri pants just aren't for me. She did seem to benefit from Stanley structuring her like crazy, even if she bitched about it the entire time (Hey Patricia, ever heard of saying "Yeah Stanley, I hear you, but I have an idea that I want to try, so just let me do it" instead of staring at him crazily and then bitching in the confessional). I'm just so over her at this point. Let her go home already.

That print. THAT PRINT.

Another person I'm kinda over at this point is Layana. While she's certainly nowhere as bad as Richard nor as ridiculous in their petty squabbles, she doesn't make anything that screams new or interesting. Yes, putting leather details on the dress to mix hard and soft was a legitimate idea, but it's so done. And what's with that print, was she on crack at Mood?

*sigh*

Oh Mustachio. This is just... just so bad. Obviously since you were paired with Michelle and the judges wanted her to win you'd be in the top, but they could've at least been honest and called you out for what a horrible train wreck this is. A real hot tranny mess. Poorly constructed, poorly executed, and STOP WITH THE STRONG 80'S SHOULDERS ALREADY. I felt for him when he flipped out about Michelle not liking his idea/fabric choice/everything, but she should've stuck to the idea of some sort of blazer and shorts, because frankly, anything is better than this. I don't mind the neon pink at all, and it could've been cool, but he just really missed the mark by like a mile. "Make it more youthful" turned into "Make it extremely vulgar and dowdy at the same time". The styling is atrocious. Also, the snarkiness just made me pissed. Mustachio is clearly cracking under pressure.

No. Just no.

While I've probably already previously said that I find Richard to be bat-shit insane, this episode really showed it for real. Seriously dude, the silent treatment? What is this, a middle school cafeteria? Keep your drama to yourself, you queen. They always ask who should go, don't act so butt-hurt when someone says you should go home. It's part of the show. Get over yourself. Also, this dress is ridiculous. It's too formal-looking for just hanging out, and to casual-looking to be worn at any kind of formal occasion. Styling's off, colour choice is off, it's too long even for a maxi dress and the proportion is just odd. Her hips look huge. You've overstayed your welcome, Richard. Get the fuck out.

So many ideas that could ve been good but went horribly horribly wrong.

So instead of sending home the drama queen who makes boring clothes, they sent home Samantha, who makes interesting clothes but not so interesting TV. This dress was pretty bad, granted. The colours are bad, it's way too short, and the heart cutout in the back is way way way too juvenile for the challenge and for Lord & Taylor in general, but it was something different at least. It could've been cute. It could've been a romper, it could've been in a different colour palette, it could've been a more flattering skirt length, but instead it just turned into a giant mess, which was unfortunate. Samantha was the last person on my 'People I could consider rooting for'-list, and now I'm stuck feeling pretty bored with watching the rest of the season. What else can they throw this way to make it interesting? I have no idea. At this point I'm going to keep watching just out of habit, or perhaps to hope that something fabulous falls of the sky, like a meteorite or a broken satellite. Seems about as likely too.