On my yakuza boss

I had a completely different post lined up for you guys, but fuck it, something so amazing came up today that there's no way I couldn't rush home from work to tell you guys about it. Well, I say amazing, but it's more of a 'holy fucking shit' moment. Remember this post where I told you guys about seeing Karate Husband's tattoo and the thoughts that came with that? Well, curiosity got the better of me when one of the Swedish waitresses came in, fuming over issues with her paycheck. She was ready to raise hell and on the verge of threatening to quit her job, and sensing an opportunity with my hyena-like ability of sniffing out weakspots, I asked her about Karate Husband's tattoo and got more dirt than I'd bargained for.

Oh Swedish waitress girl, let me in on all that juicy gossip!

Apparently my suspicions were correct - Karate Husband was a part of the yakuza. According to the Swedish girl, his tattoo (which he supposedly 'gladly shows when drunk') isn't done, as he was kicked out of the country (by who? And why? So many questions!). Also, his nipples are said to be, and I quote, "freakishly small". This all kinda explains the many weird things going on with Karate Husband and his almost hypnotizing past (except maybe the nipples part). So many of the things I've heard about him now make more sense. I'm all the happier I'm on his good side, especially since I wrote him a note in Japanese around New Years about the glass company having finished the green glass he wanted for something or other, but now he's kinda starting to scare me for real. Couldn't he just have stayed the kind old man who called me 'little fishie' on my first day at work?

Obviously I had a bit of a hard time concentrating at work after that. I kept repeating "My boss is a yakuza. My boss is a yakuza!" in my head over and over. 'My Boss the Yakuza', kinda like a less friendly version of My Neighbour Totoro. I'd probably rather want to go on adventures with Totoro than Karate Husband. This whole thing feels like something that could potentially morph into a pretty scary kind of Alice in Wonderland type story if I let my imagination run wild. It's like taking a tumble down the rabbit hole. My life has a tendency to take on some very movie-like qualities sometimes. Sometimes it feels a little too dramatic for my taste, but all in all I've gotta say that I enjoy that things just keep happening. They're mostly completely crazy, but at least that means I can tell crazy stories that entertain people. That's not all bad either.

Now all I have to do is to figure out a strategy to get my boss drunk enough to take his shirt off.

...and off to Wonderland we go.