On people fighting for you but not giving you a hug

Operation Get Work Shit Together seems to really be working out. My bosses at Ikebukuro approached me today to tell me that my Akihabara boss keeps asking them to send me over. "You're booking up here," the big bald one said. "We can send him someone else, but you we want to keep." I think my Akihabara boss is cool and all, but I kinda don't want to work there given that it's a 30 minute trip instead of a seven minute one, making it way out of my way. I've gotta say though, I love having people fight over me. My Akihabara boss even told me they had beforehand. "All the Learning Studios were fighting to get you when we heard that they were placing a young female somewhere in the area. After all, they're the ones that get booked the most." And at over 80% lessons booked for my first month, with 85% of my Ikebukuro lessons booked alone, I can see what they mean. I'm just happy I seem to be pretty good at my job too, and not just a piece of ass. Today I even got to move out of my dark corner booth into a window booth. This might've been a coincidence. I suspect it wasn't. Akihabara may bribe me with beer and cookies, but give an architecture nerd a window booth in an office on the 20th floor in the most interesting city in the world, and you've got yourself a happy camper.

On having one of those days

I hear ya, boy.

On fighting loneliness and becoming an adult

I love how people in this country unironically can go "I love drinking!" with a happy smile on their face and not automatically be pegged as alcoholics. So many people I've met through work will happily admit to getting wasted as a hobby. "I like alcohol!" they'll smile, and I kinda have to surpress a giggle. Say that anywhere else in the world and people will try to put you in rehab. I can relate to these people. I, too, like alcohol. So much so, in fact, that I decided I hadn't gotten my drink on in way too long and invited my Akihabara boss (who bribed me with cookies on Tuesday) of all people do go drinking with me after work on Thursday. I say boss, he's probably more of my manager, but he's the person who keeps the instructors organized over at the studio. He obliged by getting rid of my last lesson and taking me out for drinks at this pub a few floors down from the office, and it was awesome to just be able to talk to someone like a human being again!

On cookies and other grocery matters

It only takes one quick look into my shopping bag from my trip to the grocery store to cement the fact that I'm not a grown-up. In fact, I'm a twelve year old with a bad ice coffee habit. Seriously. I've never been the queen of proper meals, but I kinda thought I'd change that a bit once I moved. Turns out I'm still as lazy as I've ever been in the cooking department.

On getting letter bombed

Last night I got sick of not having any friends, and then it struck me: How did I make my Japanese friends to start with? Japan-guide's Friends section! Why hadn't I thought of that before? So I wrote up a short ad and posted it, and... well...

The response has been completely overwhelming. I think I've been contacted by over thirty people in the past twelve hours, encounting. Granted, some want to use me for free English practice and some are creepy dudes looking to date, but I'd like to think that somewhere in this mess of messages, I can find some cool people who just want to hang out and and be chill. It's going to take me a minute to sort through all of them, so I might be out of the loop for a little while. I'll be back soon though, promise! Peace out, homies!

On slightly off days with amazing lunch

Today is kinda shaping up to be the most awkward day ever. I've currently thrown out like half of my wardrobe onto my hallway floor, in one of those typical movie-girl "I have nothing to wear"-type rants. I'm sick of everything I own, pretty much. I get the feeling that nothing looks good here, or is weather appropriate. Somehow I think it's because I look so much different from everyone as well. I kinda want to fit in, but I can't, so I try to look cute, but their way of looking cute doesn't really correspond to my wardrobe. It sucks. It really does. It's hard to find a balance.

Who am I when I'm here? Who am I when I'm not my teacher self? What do I want to be? Who can I be? Today, what to wear on my day off has become a chore, because I don't know what's cute. At home, I always had people to go "Hey, nice outfit!" or the Philosopher to tell me I look cute, or even to just knock on G's door and go "Hey G! Cute or crazy?" and then do a little twirl. I feel like this not-having-friends-business really is undermining my confidence. 

On people being the best and people being basic bitches

I'm not going to lie, living all alone in a big city isn't always easy. It gets pretty lonely when you don't really know anyone, when people just assume that you can't talk to them and you're just passing through. Not really having friends has been kinda rough for me. I don't like being lonely. I've kinda gotten used to having people around to talk to. Here, people do double-takes a lot, but I doubt it's so much for my stellar good looks (*cough*) as for the fact that I'm a good fifteen to twenty cm taller than the average girl here. It makes me pretty uncomfortable and a little self-conscious, but the real kicker isn't that people look - it's that people don't talk to me. Like ever. At least not outside of work. People in stores and restaurants say their store- and restaurant lines and not a single thing beyond that. At least up until last night, when I didn't feel like going to bed and instead went to the 24 hour convenience store down the road to get something to eat at two in the morning.