On neglecting, birthdays and varying degrees of closeness

You guys know the drill - I drop off the face of the earth for a bit, come back, promise to get better, post responsibly for a few weeks, and then I'm gone again. I'm like the abusive, neglecting parent of blogging. I'd say I'm sorry, and that I'll change, but you know as well as I do that it's bullshit. And that's okay. I'm kinda okay with that.

Oh, and happy belated birthday, blog. You're two years old now. Honestly I thought I probably would've abandoned you by now. I guess I'm not that much of a neglecting parent after all.

On hiatuses

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On comparative dude studies

My favourite way to stop thinking about stupid boys is to start thinking about other stupid boys, and in doing that, I've come to the conclusion that some people here sure know how to flirt. Having gone on a number of dates through Tinder, I've noticed some serious skills in some of these boys. It's a lot more discrete and sensual than any flirting I've been used to before - European dudes seem to have missed the lesson in subtlety and are more likely to just move in for a grope. This guy I was having lunch with today was talking to me about the beach, and commented on the fact that I wasn't very tanned.
"Oh, I'm pretty tanned here compared to the underside of my forearms," I replied, pulling up the sleeve of my polo to expose the rest of my arm.
"Wow, you're so white! Your skin's so beautiful," he exclaimed, slowly and lightly letting his finger stroke along the length of the underside of my forearm. It was such a small thing to do, but so wholly effective. It elevated him from a 'Aw, he's cute' to a 'Damn boy, you fine' in a matter of seconds. Honestly, the fact that he just a little while before had gone "Kickboxing is a hobby of mine that I do about once a week. It's super effective, here, feel my stomach!", prompting me to poke his abs (which indeed were rock-fucking-solid), did help sway my opinion a little bit as well.

Well-dressed, handsome, smart, bespectacled boys seem to be a whole (rather numerous) breed of their own here. Just another one of those things that make me love this country.

On late night potato frustrations

Oh, and speaking of nothing at all, I'm pretty sure Potato has tapped out in the running of 'Who Wants To Be My Cuddle Companion?'. I texted him asking to meet up next weekend, and he texted me back like a bazillion hours later, going "Sorry, I'm super busy this week and next", making absolutely no effort to reschedule to any other date, and I just grew tired of the bullshit. "Got it. Take care." was all I said, and it's just like... goddamn it, just tell me if you're not wanting to hang out anymore.

I'm pissed at myself for letting it get to this. I didn't want to have feelings. Fuck those feelings. Fuck 'em. And fuck him for not having them back.

On brain farts and melancholy

This first week of work has been really exhausting. You come back, you have to get into the swing of things - and fast, or you're fucked. I accidentally left the grocery store with the plastic shopping basket still in hand, which just goes to show what completely ridiculous brain farts will occur when I'm this out of it.

Oh the feelings.

Emotionally, I feel like today I reached my limit for the week. I'd love to go straight into hermit mode at this point, but unfortunately I've got my part time gig at Mr. Stone River's office tomorrow evening, so I'm still going to have to try to be presentable. By the time the day was over today, though, I was pretty far from presentable, and I can only tell you guys how beautiful it was to change into a new flannel pajama and cozy up with melancholy movies and feelings. Eventful Thursdays call for melancholy and pajamas. It's just one of those life rules.

On compliments, charms and crankiness

At work today, the first ever fairly accurate case of 'Hey, you look like that white actress/musician/famous person' ever happened, with one of my cute (but identical) university girl students went: "I watched that movie, you know, About Time? You look like the girl from there."

Aww, cute but identical university student, you sure know how to charm my socks off.

I'll take a Rachel McAdams compliment any day over a Taylor Swift one. Plus, that hair is super cute. Maybe I should cut my bangs shorter?

On trips and trains

Trip time!

On meeting gods

You guys know what's fun? Going out for the day to visit shrines and go grocery shopping and then realizing that your key for the front door no longer works. For real. I freaked out in the doorway, bags littered on the ground by my mailbox, and stood jamming a key that wouldn't enter into the lock, progressively freaking out more and more and imagining more or less crazy scenarios where my landlord switched the lock without telling me for some reason. I snuck in when a neighbour left, and was then deathly afraid of leaving again, lest I never get into my building, ever. 

On non-fancy New Year's Eves and new resolutions

I woke up with a text from Puppy, where he goes "I hope your New Years was super fancy!". Spending it in your pajamas eating cookies and watching House of Cards doesn't really go down in history as a kind of Great Gatsby New Years, and while I was perfectly happy with it last night, I'm feeling like it was a bit of a missed opportunity this morning. Part of me thinks I should've gone out on this crazy adventure, maybe because that's what I think people expect of me now (and because it would've been pretty dope), and part of me loves spending a romantic evening with myself. Netflix and pajamas, y'all. It can't be beaten.